And what do you do? -- The name game -- Germany calling -- L'État, c'est moi -- Heralds triumph -- Doing the honours -- The powers behind the throne -- Unequal before the law -- Where there's a will -- The Royal Mint -- Duchies all to original -- Costing the earth -- Charity begins at home -- The Grand Old Duke of Sleaze -- The royal free -- Killer whales -- We are not amused -- The royal box of tricks -- Weak at the knees -- The Fab Four : tomorrow never knows -- On your bike.